{"title":"Greeting Cards","description":"\u003cp\u003eAll-occasion greeting cards that leave people howling with laughter instead of politely pretending.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eShop funny, rude, sarcastic, and sweary greeting cards for birthdays, weddings, anniversaries, retirements, apologies, encouragement, and those beautifully awkward moments that deserve more than a generic message.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eBoldly funny. Unapologetically real. Made in Canada for people who say what everyone else is thinking.\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"fuck-youre-old","title":"Fuck You’re Old","description":"\u003cp\u003eLooking for a funny birthday card for someone who’s getting old and deserves the truth? This rude adult birthday card delivers it in three beautifully blunt words: Fuck. You’re. Old.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eNo sentimental waffle. No pretending age is just a number. 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They just might shit themselves reading it, and the candles will blow themselves out.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eBecause blowing out that many candles takes serious lung power and bowel control — and at their age, there are no guarantees. One big puff and anything could happen. Anything.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eFor the birthday legend who's been around long enough to find this funny. Probably.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eInside: Blank for your own message\u003cbr\u003eIncludes: White envelope\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Ink Fusion","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":45105173135568,"sku":"IF-1770-YOU-INK-DEF","price":5.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0673\/5501\/7424\/files\/31.jpg?v=1787010698"},{"product_id":"this-card-is-shit-nursing-home","title":"This card is Shit-Nursing Home","description":"\u003cp\u003eThink this card is a bit shit? 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